


Mama Says

by fightforyourwrite



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Chess, Children, Gen, POV First Person, Pre-Canon, Pre-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-09
Updated: 2017-07-09
Packaged: 2018-11-30 01:30:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,049
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11453181
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fightforyourwrite/pseuds/fightforyourwrite
Summary: Mikasa Ackerman is seven years old and finds that there are some things in her life that she'll only understand when she's older.





	Mama Says

**Author's Note:**

> I'm getting really into writing stories from the perspective of younger characters. I did 9-year-old Historia and I think I'm going to do 5-year-old Jean next.

Mama is hurt today.

Papa says that her stomach is causing her pain. Because of that, Mama needs to stay in bed to rest. She came out to eat breakfast and lunch with me and Papa, but she went back to the bedroom when we were finished.

I asked Mama why her stomach was hurting. She said that it wasn’t because she ate something bad or moved too much. She said that it was something else.

She also said that I’m too young to understand what’s going on and that she’s gonna explain it to me when I’m older.

So I asked Papa why Mama’s stomach was hurting and he said the same thing.

It’s like the joke where he tells me to pull his finger and then passes gas. He laughs for a while and then says he won’t explain it to me until I’m a little bigger.

I think Mama and Papa are hiding things from me.

I don’t really I like that.

Mama is still hurt though. She won’t come outside to garden or come to my room to play with me. She tells me that it’s not bad and that she’ll probably be able to do more things tomorrow.

I hope she feels better soon. I don’t like seeing Mama hurt.

After lunch, Mama goes back into the bedroom to rest and Papa says he has to go out. There’s a town nearby where he’s meeting a very close friend.

Papa says that he won’t be gone for too long. If I need anything, I should just go to Mama. He takes his hat when he leaves and closes the door behind him.

Sometimes I’m left alone like this. There are times where Mama and Papa are too busy doing something else to be with me.

I’m not mad that it happens. It’s just something that they have to do.

Usually, if they’re too busy to do stuff with me, I find something to do on my own.

I draw if I feel like it. There’s a stack of paper that Papa teaches me to read, write, and count with. When he’s not looking, I like to grab a piece for me, take a pencil, and draw something on it.

I draw things like flowers, trees, animals, the sky, and Mama and Papa.

I don’t know if I’m good at drawing though. I can’t draw people or animals right. They always look weird and pudgy.

I still need something to do while Papa is gone.

This is why I think we should get a dog. I told Mama and Papa that if we got one, I wouldn’t be too lonely whenever they got busy.

I could walk it or play with it or go out into woods when there’s nothing else to do.

But we can’t a dog. Papa says that he and Mama already have their hands full with me, and that if we did, it would be him cleaning up all of its poo.

It sucks, because I think it’d be fun if we got a dog. I’d name it something cool like Sora or Ingo and I’d let it sleep in my bed and I’d take it for walks and play in the woods with it.

Mama says I’m too small to go out into the woods myself, but if I have a dog, I’ll be fine because the dog can protect me. It just needs to be a really, really big dog.

I did try to go into the woods alone once. Mama was busy gardening and I really wanted to see what was in there. I slipped away while she wasn’t looking and tried to go into the woods around our home.

I didn’t get too far because I ran into Papa coming back from hunting. He laughed when I tried to hide behind a tree and had to carry me back to Mama.

Mama freaked out when she realized that I walked away from her.

She says that the woods are dangerous. There are things like wolves and bears in there. It’s not safe for someone small like me. I have to be older until I can go alone. For now, I can only go in when Mama or Papa is with me.

I don’t really like that. I want to do something on my own for once.

I think I should take a nap while Papa is gone. There’s nothing else to do. I could draw, but I don’t feel like it. I could read too but reading makes my head hurt. The letters sometimes get mixed up and I can’t tell what was written.

I go to my bedroom and shut the door. I go to my window and shut them as well. I pull the curtains over too.

It’s not the nicest day outside. Yesterday was just a little bit cloudy and very very sunny. Today is the exact opposite. The sky looks grey with all the clouds in it, except for a few patches of blue that show through cloud-holes.

It might rain. Mama says that rain is good for the plants in the garden. Rain is cold and wet and sad, but it makes the flowers happy. It makes them strong without us having to help them.

I can’t make myself like rain. I can’t play outside in the rain. It keeps me trapped inside with nowhere to go.

When I’m done pulling the curtains over the window, I pull the blanket off my bed so I can climb into it.

My pillow moves when I pull the blanket and falls off the end. I walk over to pick it up.

When I lean down and take it into my hands, I find something resting at the foot of the bed that I forgot was there.

It’s a wooden box. I know exactly what’s inside.

I kneel down and open the top. Inside is a black and white board with a lot of black and white pieces.

It’s a game that Mama likes. It’s called chess.

In chess, it’s the black pieces versus the white pieces. You put each colour on different sides and move them across the squares on the board.

The pieces have their own specific ways to move.

The one called the Rook can only move in straight lines.

The Pawns can go two squares on the first move but only one after that.

The Horse can jump across pieces but only move in an L-shape.

The Bishop can only go diagonally.

The King can only move one square at a time and the Queen can do so much more.

The Queen has to protect the King because the King can’t move a lot. The Queen is the strongest because she can move left, right, and diagonally.

I like the Queen the most.

I close the box and pick it up.

Mama might be hurt and stuck in bed, but the fun thing about chess is that you can play it sitting down. No standing needed.

With the box, I leave my room and go to Mama and Papa’s.

I knock on the door and wait until I hear Mama respond from the inside. If she doesn’t respond, then she’s asleep and I have to play chess myself.

But Mama isn’t asleep because after I knock, I hear her saying.

“Yes?”

“Mama, can I come in?” I ask.

“Of course, Mikasa.”

When she says that, I turn the knob and push the door open.

Mama is on the bed, just like I knew she would be. She has the blankets wrapped all around her and she’s laying down.

“What do you need?” Mama asks. She doesn’t get up.

I walk towards her bed and climb on. I move until I’m kneeling next to her, then I put the box down for a second and press on her shoulders.

“Mama? Mama, can you get up?”

I think she was trying to sleep, but now she’s humming and starting to turn over.

She looks me in the eye.

“What is it?”

I grab the box and hold it up to her, “I know you’re hurt, but are you too hurt to play a game with me?”

She chuckles and says, “Sweetie, I’m not hurt. Just in a little pain.” She starts to sit up. “If it’s just chess, then yes, I can play with you.”

I move so I’m sitting in front of her. After I open the box, I take out the board and all the pieces. I put the board between me and her.

I remember how Mama told me to set them up.

The pawns go in the front in a straight line. At the edges, the Rooks. Beside the Rooks, the Horses. Beside the Horses, the Bishops. Then the King and the Queen go in the middle with the King on the left and the Queen on the right.

When I’m done setting up the game, I look up to Mama.

She looks like she’s about to laugh, which I think is strange because I haven’t said something that she could find funny.

I’m confused.

“What? Did I set it up wrong?”

Mama shakes her head, “Not at all.” She starts to chuckle, “You’re just very, very adorable.”

Mama looks at me and smiles. She reaches over and puts her hand on my head, then she rubs it against me until my hair gets very messy. Then she moves her hand down until it rests on my cheek.

I don’t know why Mama always does that. She says that it’s a way to show me that she loves me and she cares about me. But Mama also hugs me and kisses me too, I think that shows me the exact same thing.

I guess there are a lot of ways to tell someone that you love them.

“Do you want to go first?” I ask her. I gave her the white pieces for a reason.

Mama nods her head. “I would.”

She looks down at the board for a few seconds, then she reaches over and moves a Pawn on the edge two squares forward.

It doesn’t take me too long to make my move. I take the Horse and move it until it’s in front of a Pawn and a Rook. The Horse is my second favourite after the Queen, because the Horse can jump.

Mama says that in chess, there are not a lot of ways to win until four turns have been taken. You have to wait until the game has progressed, then see if your opponent leaves themselves wide open, and then find a way to attack.

You can’t just send all your pawns at them at once. That’s not the best way to win.

On Mama’s turn, she moves a Pawn again. When it’s mine, I move my Horse once more.

The fourth turn is done. Now all that matters is trying to win.

Mama taught me to play chess when I was five. That was two years ago. I’m seven now, and she says that I’m getting really good at it.

Papa can sing and hunt, Mama can dance and make flowers happy, and I can play chess.

I think chess is good enough for me.

Mama says that it’s important to have something that you’re good at. It means that you have a place in this world.

Mama says a lot of things. Sometimes, I have trouble keeping track of everything she says to me.

Last week, Mama told me that I was growing taller. She says that I might become as tall as Papa in the next few years. Mama told me that I’m getting very strong too. Now I can help Papa get water from the river or gather firewood with him.

Mama also told me that I’m starting to look more and more like her every day, I’m just smaller. She says that whenever she’s brushing my hair or giving me a bath. Whenever she does, she always makes her voice quiet and soft, quieter and softer than it usually is.

I think it’s a good thing that I’m starting to look like her.

Mama is beautiful, very beautiful. I want to look as beautiful as her one day.


End file.
